You Can Never Have Too Much Hoff

David Hasselhoff is one of my absolute, all-time, hands down favorite people to ever grace the face of the earth with their presence. I want to be his best friend, and go to exotic places with him, like liquor stores in Germany (where he’s really, really famous). I bet we’d have a hell of a time during Oktoberfest.

I love David so much, I might start a church of the Hoff. My feelings for him are so strong, I’m willing to overlook those elvish shoes (wtf is up with the laces? Are they pink?). Maybe he’s just getting into the holiday spirit. The Army jacket just shows that he means business, damnit. He’s going to attack Hollywood with so much Christmas spirit, people will think he’s with the Marines.